Well, I must admit that some things are improving-- namely the age-range of men who seem to be interested in me-- while other things are... getting worse. Let me explain-- the weather was crappy today so I didn't get to do everything I wanted. I don't really like standing outside in the rain waiting for the bus to Iguatemi because I usually end up getting filthy-- from the mud, puddles, and cars that splash when they drive by way to fast. So, I kept my research local this Sunday. I ate lunch at the Subway down the street-- a turkey sub. Yum.
Then, I came back to the apartment and tried to see if I could get some internet access. While I was standing out in the hallway moving my computer around to see if there was any signal at all I was stopped by a couple-- a middle-aged woman and a younger guy. They were asking me about the internet and what not. I learned that the woman was French and that the guy was a Turk. After conversing for some time I learned that they were friends. Given that this woman was at least 45 and the guy appeared to be 30 I thought that he was gay (also, he was wearing tight pants and a tight shirt...) and that they were just friends. Boy was I wrong... and right (about the friends part).
At 6pm I was sitting in my room watching the X-Files-- waiting for a decent time to get dinner (people here eat late and some restaurants don't open until 6 on the dot-- I usually try to go around 6:30pm). The doorbell buzzed. I went to see who it was and it was the Turkish guy-- I forget his name-- it starts with a B, I think. Sounds like Berashr or something. Anyway, since I thought he was gay I didn't see anything strange about talking to him. I let him into my room and tried to speak some weird combination of French-Portugusese-English. It was shocking to see how bad my French was at first but how quickly it sort of came back to me. I couldn't remember how to say a lot of things but that is mainly because I haven't heard, read, or spoken French in almost 2 years! Or maybe longer actually-- the last class I took was in the Fall of 2006-- so over two years! =-o! It is quite rusty-- but it was interesting to see how I would start to remember things and how I could still understand him (he had a weird little Turkish-French accent...). ANYWAY! so we are chatting, blah, blah, blah. And all of a sudden I realize that he is trying to explain to me that love and sex are separate. I'm confused-- because I have no idea how we got on this topic-- initially I was trying to explain to him what the X-Files were (a TV series from the 90s-- not a movie) and he seemed really lost. Anyway, all this to say that the guy asked if I would like to have sex with him-- just like that. Amazingly, I kept my cool (well, wait... now that I think about it-- when have I not kept my cool?!) and suddenly realized that this guy, although Turkish, was dressed like a normal EUROPEAN male-- not a gay male. *sigh* I forget these things after being in Brazil for so long, I guess. Anyway, he kept touching me, kissing my neck... asked me if I would make-out with him... all the while I was trying not to be mean and keep my food down (he was a smoker and a non-deodarant user-- not very pleasing to my olfactory senses). Finally, I decided to tell him (in broken French) that I had a copain in the States (boyfriend, for you non-French speakers-- it took me a while to remember this word-- stupid me) and that he would be very upset if I was unfaithful to him. This resulted in a loooooooong drawn out conversation between him and me about how my brain was messed up (according to him). He kept saying that my bf was in the States (his name was Dudley, btw... hehe) and that because of that I slept alone. That I should indulge in love, blah, blah, blah and have fun, blah some more. Whatever. I told him that for me this was not possible-- I could not separate love and sex. He said he would respect me (all the while trying to convince me otherwise...). I was so confused... and it was so awkward. He kissed my hand and left my apartment.
What have I learned from this? A few things:
1. My gaydar needs some readjusting-- for my own benefit and safety.
2. Apparently I am attractive to Turkish men while wearing stained shorts (the back right pocket has a bleach stain from when I sat on the floor too soon after it was cleaned), holey socks (my left sock had a hole), old tennis shoes, an old ratty t-shirt, glasses, and no make-up. Did I mention I was also sweating because I had just closed the windows and hadn't turned on the A/C yet? Yeah. I guess that made me look like a regular movie star!
3. I really have no desire to be anywhere near smokers... or people who don't use deodarant.
4. Love and sex really are inseparable for me. I was pretty sure about this before-- but I am absolutely sure now given that I almost wanted to laugh in his face-- his suggestion was so preposterous.
5. Not only 70 yr old men find me attractive.
6. For some reason every encounter like this that I have had results in me being labeled as-- intelligent. Perhaps it is my ability to talk my way through (out of?) any situation and my poker face. If I am freaked out or disturbed I don't show it. This leads guys to think that I'm really serious and thoughtful-- or something. Really, I just don't want to make things worse by overreacting, I think...
Interesting lessons, no?
Btw, I am totally leaving the building tomorrow... I am going to the shopping mall and watching back-to-back movies if I have to. I just don't want to run into him again-- I did run into him after this episode but it was in front of the reception desk and I was playing with a dog (THANK YOU CANINE!!!) so it was ok.
Anyhow, I am grateful for two things-- first that he did not try to kiss me on the mouth. I would have surely puked into his mouth. Ugh. And second, I am thankful for my Norwegian friends. After this episode I ran upstairs to their room and hid out there for a bit. They found the story as ridiculous as I did and I told them that I wished I had spoken to them before his arrival-- I would have put two and two together, I think I would have if I had been with Europeans-- who are used to men with tight pants and tight shirts.
It's funny, I had been thinking of brushing up on my French.... I will need some time away from Brazil and Portuguese before I will be fully able to start re-learning grammar-- but now I'm not so sure. It also made me question my sanity-- what the hell was I thinking letting an unknown guy into my room? I really thought he was gay-- but still! Perhaps I should affirm that guys are gay before I let them into my room? Sounds like a good plan. :) I guess this is what I get though-- earlier today I was thinking about what it would be like if I had hooked up with a guy here. I had decided, however, that it wouldn't have really worked out and was glad that it wasn't something that I ever seriously looked into.
Ok, end of story/rant/complaint. Thank goodness I only have 7 more nights in this building!!!
Oh, wait. I FORGOT TO MENTION THE BEST PART!!! He thought I was only 18. He is 30. He was surprised when he walked into my room and saw that I lived alone. How CREEPY is that?!?! I hope I grow up soon-- I am almost 26... I can't be passing as an 18 year old forever... I'd be happy with 22 or so. :)
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